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Staying Single

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We have noted how Paul, in the book of 1 Corinthians, addressed a number of questions that had been posed to him by the believers of that city. In the first part of chapter 7, he faced questions concerning the supposed spiritual benefits of celibacy in marriage, which he rejected out of hand. Marriage is a good gift from God and serves several purposes including satisfying the drive for physical intimacy, in fact, it may be God’s means of saving one’s unbelieving spouse. But now that he has dealt with questions posed by married couples, Paul turns his attention to those who are not yet married.

Now concerning virgins: I have no commandment from the Lord; yet I give judgment as one whom the Lord in His mercy has made trustworthy, I suppose therefore that this is good because of the present distress–that it is good for a man to remain as he is: Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife. But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you.

1 Corinthians 7:25-28

In the absence of a direct, biblical command on whether single Christians should pursue marriage, sincere believers had come to different positions and were unable to resolve the disagreement, so they appealed to Paul. Apparently, there were some in Corinth who counseled young believers not to marry, and some may have even suggested that marriage would be sinful. Paul acknowledged that there was no commandment from the Lord” concerning virgins, and he offered his own judgment as one who had been made trustworthy by God’s mercy. His advice to singles? It’s good to remain as you are.

This is a further application of the principle that he expressed so clearly in the preceding verses, that everyone should remain in the circumstance in which he was called. Notice that Paul does not command that the unmarried remain single, but he does say that it is “good” for you to remain so. He gives two reasons why this is good advice. First, because of what he calls “the present distress” in v.26. While he does not explicitly state what distress he had in mind, it seems most likely that Paul was anticipating the persecution that Christians would face from government authorities in the days ahead. It is hard enough for a single person to endure hardship and persecution, but harder still for a husband or wife to watch their spouse suffer for the cause of Christ. And worry about one’s family would only increase the turmoil that persecution inevitably brings. Paul’s second reason for this advice is that marriage brings trouble. As John MacArthur put it: Marriage involves conflicts, demands, hardships, sacrifices, and adjustments that singleness does not. Marriage is ordained by God, good, holy, and fulfilling; but it does not solve all problems. It brings more.” Trials are to be expected by everyone seeking to live a godly life, and marriage will only multiply one’s obligations and afflictions in this world.

Paul’s concern is that Christians be focused on serving the Lord and living for him rather than on the things of this present age:

But this I say, brethren, the time is short, so that from now on even those who have wives should be as though they had none, those who weep as though they did not weep, those who rejoice as though they did not rejoice, those who buy as though they did not possess, and those who use this world as not misusing it. For the form of this world is passing away. But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord–how he may please the Lord. But he who is married cares about the things of the world–how he may please his wife. There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world–how she may please her husband. And this I say for your own profit, not that I may put a leash on you, but for what is proper, and that you may serve the Lord without distraction. (v.29-35)

1 Corinthians 7:29-35

Your present circumstances are only temporary. In fact, everything that you experience in this life is merely a passing shadow of things to come. This is why Paul can say that if you are married, you should not long to be single, and if you are single, you should not long for marriage (v.27). With that said, it is not sinful to marry if you are currently single, but whatever you do, you ought to live with your eyes on the world that is to come rather than on this present age.

This principle helps to explain Paul’s statement that, since the time is short, “those who have wives should be as though they had none.” Is he contradicting what he has already said about remaining as you are, not divorcing your spouse, and not withholding intimacy from your spouse? No. Those are all clear statements that provide the foundation for this verse. He means that, as a married man, you should look ahead and see that you will someday soon enjoy a very different kind of relationship with your wife in heaven. This will help you keep your marriage in perspective.

But we all need to keep marriage in perspective. When it comes to service for God, Paul says that marriage is a distraction. If you are single, you should rejoice that God has given you the opportunity to serve him without distraction, and seek to “be holy both in body and in spirit.” Husbands and wives must concern themselves with pleasing their spouse, but you may live only to please God. God has granted you this liberty right now, take advantage of it as long as you can and use it to serve the Lord and not yourself.

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